Helping a loved one recover from addiction is not an easy task, especially if you have no idea on how to do it. The first thing that you have to understand is that relapse can take place after your husband has decided to quit from his bad habits. This will happen regardless of the addiction that he has – whether it involves cigarettes, narcotics or alcohol. Second, believe in yourself that you have what it takes to help the other spouse. Never doubt your capacity to motivate him in recovering from the mental condition.
Here are some of the things that you could do today:
Avoid Confronting Him
Now is not the time to keep on confronting your partner about his problems. All he needs is to feel that you support his decision of solving his issues on addiction. Stop blaming him for the mistakes of the past because it will not offer any benefit for both of you. In fact, it can only worsen the situation, which will make him more complacent in changing his old habits. Like what Dr. Howard Samuels, PsyD used to say, “Admitting you have a problem is the first step in treating your addiction.”
Use The Right Tone
Whenever you want to discuss something with him, be sure to speak in a polite manner. Treat him with respect at all times. Just because he is the reason for his addictive problems does not mean that you can bring it up anytime you want. Learn how to talk to him using the right tone. This will make him more motivated in pursuing the recovery process.
Set Up An Intervention
If your husband shows signs of relapse, do not hesitate to try setting up an intervention. Call his close family members and friends. Let them know about the goals of the intervention. You can also consider looking for a professional interventionist to ensure that nothing will go wrong during the process. Take note that some interventions, especially those that are poorly executed, may lead to more significant problems. Therefore, “If emotions become heightened, it’s a good idea to implement a safe word prior to the discussion which indicates that one of the partners needs to take a break,” says Michelle Smith, LMHC.
Look For A Therapist
“Therapy and couples counseling can drastically improve your relationship issues” says Hannah Goodman, LMHC. Sowhen searching for a therapist, it is ideal to consider someone who specializes in addiction. At this point, it is essential to emphasize that there are tons of therapists available in your local area. However, only a few of them can effectively handle addiction cases. Help your husband by looking for a professional who knows how to deal with relapse issues. It is also advisable to bring him to a treatment center if the need arises.
Express Your Affection
The truth is that maintaining a good relationship with your partner at this time is going to be challenging. It will be difficult on your part to forgive him for what he has done. This is why you must remind yourself how much you love the other person. At the same time, do not forget of your obligation to express your love and affection to your husband. It will be good for him to feel that you are there for him in his struggle.
A recovering addict, like your partner, needs to feel that someone still believes in his goodness. Never forget this so that you could finally move forward to better tomorrows.